falling in love is easy. and the beautiful flowers, gifts of love and a warm body to snuggle up and make passionate love to just sweeten the deal. yes, it's great to be in love. but beyond the bouquets, expensive chocolates and romantic dinners, staying in love is no walk in the park.

if you've ever had your heart broken, you'd know it takes determination and a lot of hard work for two people to stay together. so bollocks to the notion of romantic love 'cos reality bites. hard.

love may be many a spllendour thing but to really know what love is, maybe we need to find out what it's not. that way, we manage each other's expectations with less disappointment.

here's what i've learnt from my own experiences as well as painful ones from the people around me.

love is not...

• just wanting the same thing. taking the same route there is equally important,if not more.
• giving in blindly. losing yourself will definitely take toll on your relationship.
• holding on to what's not yours.
• forever. accept that.
• making empty promises to pacify your loved one. taking small conscientious steps to improve is more admirable.
• divisble. you've to multiply it.
• me! me! me! it's us.
• assuming you know everything. it's about learning.
• turning a deaf ear. you've to listen. hard.
• keep quiet either. communicationis key.

to all, happy valentine's day.